Well its been 2 weeks since last I writ. I waged war against lethargy and apathy for a fortnight and was bested by both. But the protagonist of this story does not have quit in his lexicon. Procrastinaion yes, but quit, no. And so, the conclusion of my hiatus begins now. Here are the Top 5 events of the past 2 weeks, in no particular order of importance.
5. Teppanyaki. At times, I'm just in amazement at how awesome China can be. Theres nothing like an all you can eat Japanese, all you can drink to round off a hard week at work. Having said that, I did encounter a slight speed bump on my road to fun. Whilst enjoying a lovely meal among good company, indulging in a fair amount of sake bombs, I spy with my little eye a foreigner (I know his nationality but to not offend an entire race, I'll keep it as just a foreigner) hovering rather near our table.I mean he was hovering extremely close but I didn’t pay much attention. 10 minutes laters he’s still satnding there and all of sudden theres noticeably more ppl hovering around us. He leans into our table now and asks when we plan on leaving. Say WHA?!? He continues to tell us that we were supposed to leave at 9 (it was 930) quite condescendingly and loudly. My friend calmly proceeds to tell him that he’s wrong and we reserved the table for the entire night. He keeps insisting that its his friends birthday, they booked it for 9, we shouldn’t be there blah blah blah, yakity yak. We held firm that we had the table all night, plus we hadn’t gotten all our food yet .Eventually I pipe in with a “Dude, you’re ruining our meal. Why don’t you go away?” He responds with “Excuse, don’t call me dude you rude American”. HAHAHAHA. First off, I’m obviously not American. Secondly, this clown is a giant ignoramus because he’s actively making a scene without regard for anyone else in the restaurant. From that point I continued to ask for the menu again and order even more food and libations. Take that
4. German party. So my flatmates decided to throw a going away/birthday party at our apartment. Cool. Of course I have zero communication with any of them because they are room dwelling
hermits but I was informed of said party and to bring over friends. Did I mention I have 3 roommates who are all German. Well after I brought over my 15 guests, the party still managed to be 90% German. And at about 1 a.m. my friends went to the bar down the road. I said I'd meet them later because I was having an engaging conversation. At any rate, half hour passed and I realized in a room of 40, not only was I the only Asian there, I was the only one not a descendant from Deutschland. Having never been to Germany I have no idea whats its like if the party was any indication, I assume it would be full of smokers and a lot people who sit on couches and listen to the 80s rock.
3. Coming in at number 4 and also the awkward moment of the week. Last Friday I get home at about 4 a.m. Get to my door just in time to here some yelling in German and my roommate leaving in a huff. I go inside and theres some strange guy who I've never seen before chilling there on my couch.
me: "Hey" I awkwardly say
him: "Hello" he says in drunken elation.
me: "Who exactly are you I ask?"
him: "I'm your roommates boyfriend from Germany. Well ex-boyfriend, we just broke up." Oddly enough with a terd-eating grin on his face.
Cue awkward momentary silence.
me: "So how long have you been in Shanghai?"
him: "I just arrived today"
More awkward silence.
me: "COOL. I'm going to pee."
Hows that for a smooth escape. Ha.
An hour later, I leave my apartment to go to Huangshan for the weekend. Then I get home late Monday late. Go to bed. Wake up early Tuesday. Go to dinner .Get home late. Go to bed. Wake up early Wednesday. Get home at a moderate time. Decide to iron my clothes. Walk into the master bedroom to get the ironing board and what the f do I see. The same guy from Friday is laying there chilling on the bed.
me: "Uhhh...hello...."
him: "Hey"
me: "Do you live here now?"
him: "No."
me: "Sooo.....?"
him: "Oh well i'm just staying here till tomorrow. Sorry about last Friday. i was really drunk and me your roommate broke up. So I've just been here"
me: "Yeah.....sorry bout that. Well I'm just getting the ironing board. I'm going to go iron my clothes now.
Another sweet escape by me.
So to recap. This guy flies to Shanghai on Friday. Gets broken up with the same night. And STILL crashes at her/my apartment. For 5 days. Man have you heard of a hostel. Its like 6 euros a night. Do you smell that. Its the stench of awkwardness.
2. Huangshan. Translated to Yellow Mountain. Pretty sweet. I'm not gonna post any pictures on
here. (okay just one. I don't even know what its really a pic of) Its hard to capture the actual grandeur of the mountains, not to mention the effort it actually took to get to the top. Plus they're all on facebook. We walked nothing but stairs for 12+ hours this past weekend. My legs have never been as sore as they were when I got up for work this morning. I could literally not walk without pain. I left for work at the regular time and showed up 15 minutes late because I was walking so slow. In short my best friend was the escalator today. My enemies included standing, sitting, stairs, and curbs. Inclines, declines. Sudden movements. Not sudden movements. General existence was quite painful.
1. The massage I got 10 minutes ago. 100 minutes. 70RMB (12 Canadian). Theres nothing like an after dinner full body rub down with some of your peeps. Had a nice little language exchange with our masseuses.Nothing useful and nothing that I remember but there was some language learning. Even got some German throw in there. Apparently I'm 可爱 (cute) when I speak English and my eyes are 好看 (good looking) and 性感 (sexy). Yeah tell me something I didn't already know. Oh and they thought I was Indonesian. There was also a mouse running around the room and hiding. He was terrorizing the ladies. In terms of massaging, she really did a number on my back and attempted to make my legs usable again. I think i also got 3rd degree burs from All in all. Awesome.
Thats it. I'm tired. I can't keep these stupid posts short. I hope you're not as bored reading this as I was writing it. Next one will be better. Time to sleep. I need my rest for this weekends debaucheries. Stay tuned.
"五岳归来不看山，黄山归来不看岳
- Chinese Proverb
